The last couple of weeks have been really amazing, rollercoastering through this energy is hard work!. This energy as we are transitioning forward is very heavy going and it calls for us to look deeply into our vulnerability and move forward in our growth and understanding. I think I have cried buckets of tears for days and seriously wanted to be in a place which has not been so heavy!!
When did Reinvention of Self get such hard work? Well it’s not that it is hard work but it is simply overdue for us to look at everything… By everything I MEAN everything. All those little bits that you hide from yourself, all those worries, all those judgements, all illuminated and brought to you to look at for your self evolution by everyone and everything else in the Universe. Well the good news is that the energy is lifting and will continue to lift as we get towards the 15th of April, expect a mad week to the 20th as illumination comes in. This year was always going to be broken up into three monthly sections, so taking another breath before we plunge forward again is a good thing.
I had the absolutely pleasure of spending time with a lovely man in Spirit who was waiting for his person to arrive yesterday and I have thought a lot about what he was talking about. Normally for me I ask Spirit to talk to me about their perceptions, about how they feel about their people here, what they want to help with during the session. Sometimes I simply should record all those conversations, for they are incredibly fascinating.
He had been around for an hour or so before I stopped and simply chatted.
“What are you worried about the most for your person today?” He leans against the wall watching me with the piglet.
“You always feel like you are on a tightrope, that everything at times is such a balancing act. We see you simply with your arms out in the air, holding yourselves so tensely, as you feel like you are walking an extremely thin rope, teetering on the edge of a precipice. Terrified to look down and terrified that you may fail or fall”.
“Do we all do that?” I ask. “Pretty much” he says. “The thing is though you aren’t on any of that, ever. If you only looked down you would see that you are only 10cm above the ground, not even that, and if you wanted to step off that feeling then you could just step down. Instead though you can feel like you have lived your whole life with your arms outstretched and balancing. We kind of cluster all the way around you, encouraging you to see it more simply and loving you at the same time. Cheering you on really”.
“Isn’t it kind of easy, to comment about that now? After all you have done your time and you are on the other side now. Didn’t you do the same thing while you were here?”
He laughs “You have no idea how frustrating it is to know that, what I could have done differently, or watch her struggle. But then, it’s not frustrating because I can see all the learning I gained, because if you work it out, you would celebrate your life more, you wouldn’t be constantly picking at all the things you thought were wrong or you thought were right. You would see that every moment is precious and should be embraced for what it brings to you. By the time you get to the finish line, you will look back and say simply, I should have enjoyed myself more, why did I get so caught up in all the unimportant stuff?”
“Well it feels important to us while we are in it, surely?”. He laughs out loud. “Of course it does, that’s the thing about the human experience, when you are in it, you don’t realise that where ever you put your focus and your energy, that’s where it becomes consuming. Your whole life becomes consuming on something you think is important when the WHOLE lot of it is really important. So you focus on jobs, on finding happiness and you forget it’s just like a fair ground ride. That there will be an end, and at the end you will look back and think, can I have another go? I don’t think I enjoyed it as much as I should have”.
I laugh this time and think for a moment. “What’s your suggestion then? Ignore everything and just be happy?”. “It’s not about ignoring, it’s not about judging, it’s not about whose friends with who, what car you drive, the job you have, the family you chose. It’s all about YOU and how you feel and what you experience. You set yourselves up at times to fail, by an illusion, a perception, that things should be a certain way ALL the time. It sets such small boundaries for the enjoyment you could be having. If you took a step back and looked at life as something so temporary that you needed to BE in every moment, that every moment doesn’t need to be thought about, or worried about but embraced with sheer delight of being. Then you would start to see that everything is possible, and anything is possible. You just get to choose where you put your energy and your focus, that’s all. Recognising the choices you have would be a great start. For every choice, there is another one, and neither of them are wrong and if you don’t like them well there is always more. What you perceive them to be is where your greatest limitation is.
Nothing ever needs to fit into a square box, but you got through life labelling this, fitting into that, making it so limited and so much harder, and just sucking the fun out of everything”.
He smiles at me. “If I had advice for everyone, it would be JUST DO IT, and have a hell of a time doing it as well”.
I laugh out loud and startle the piglet. Leaning down to pat him reassuringly, I watch the sun shining down on the green of the paddock, the sheep grazing and listen to the piglet squeaking happily.
I kind of love his answer, but are we brave enough to embrace it? It means looking at things so differently, without a perception, without buying into the pressure of ourselves or the expectations we create. It means truly just loving every moment, dreaming passionately and without boundaries of having our beautiful lives and living that. Are we tired enough yet of not changing, because it’s only when we are truly uncomfortable with ourselves, we look at change.
I hear a whisper from the off worlds… “Think about it too much and you’ll forget the fun of it” and my laughter rings through the shed again.