I meet a lot of people and some of the people I meet really struggle with their feelings and other peoples. By this mean I mean have you ever walked into a room full of people and suddenly felt that you were overwhelmed by all their stuff. Even though they are just sitting quietly and doing their own thing? Have a sudden feeling of loss, of pain, hurt and feel it completely. To feel symptoms in your physical body that are simply not yours? Sore back, neck aches, back aches?
A lot of people who have a raised awareness of empathy get literally “blasted” with these emotions from others over and over again. It can feel exhausting to not really know which emotions are yours, and which belong to others. I met a lovely man the other day who asked me “Is it a blessing or a curse to be an Empath?”. I firmly believe that it is a blessing to be an Empath. However, as an Empath being able to pick up other peoples emotions, symptoms and thoughts, it is firstly incredibly important to look after yourself.
One of the first things to acknowledge is you can work with your ability. You do not have to be a slave to it nor be trapped by it. It is a matter of acknowledging quite a few choices and implementing techniques to keep yourself safe. No one needs to take on board anyone else’s stuff, but you have to make the choice in yourself about doing that. When I was very young Spirit taught me a couple of very valuable techniques for avoiding getting “punched” with other people’s physical and emotional states.
Firstly, I would have a tendency to “sponge” people’s emotions and most empaths do. I would take it all on myself and start to feel worse and worse and worse, to the point if I could not “get away” from the person I would throw up. I suffered dreadfully with feeling sick all the time and wondered what was wrong with me. I would feel like my moods were on a pendulum that swung randomly and was bombarded by thoughts that seemed to come from nowhere, dreadfully again affecting my mood. If you think of filling up an empty glass with water, that is the effect of an Empath taking on board from every one they come in contact with, their personal emotions and information.
Spirit would work with me getting me to acknowledge the “real” me. This was a recognition of what my own energy feels like, because I can see and feel energy, this was a really good learning. But what happens when you are an Empath and you can only FEEL the energy? The lovely Guide I had at the time patiently would ask me to question every emotion, every feeling. Simply put I would acknowledge that a random emotion, was not mine because it came in so fast and if really focussed on it, it felt a little like eavesdropping on a phone call, or a crossed line phone call. It just felt odd. It was only with practice that I could understand that slightly OFF feeling. My Guide patiently explained, immediately I sensed that slightly off feeling to ask immediately for the emotion to be removed from me. He taught this to me very slowly at first to get me to see that I needed to take the time to “look” for the slightly off feeling of it not being mine. Otherwise it would be off to the Dr with whatever I thought was wrong with me. Over a period of time I could sense very quickly energy that didn’t belong to me and shift it before it “whacked” me overwhelmingly.
Now I know there is an even quicker way to move things as well. Acknowledge IMMEDIATELY the emotion is not yours. This has a two-fold effect, it is acknowledged, not owned and you are consciously not “sponging” or continuing to absorb it into your energy. Immediately the energy is not settling into your energy field and in making that conscious choice to NOT take it into your field, you have a choice of what you can do with it. I do one of two things. Ask the Guides or Spirit or your Higher Self to REMOVE it immediately. The importance here is NOT owning it, not trying to explore the emotion, the more you do that, the more you are integrating it into your own energy field and the more you will suffer for it. The next thing I do is envisage myself as a pane of glass. Allowing the emotion to pass right through me, as thin as possible I can feel it pass through me but not be retained within me. I shift my focus immediately off the pain, the thought, the feeling, and allow it just to flow right through me.
It was never mine in the first place, so it becomes simply MY choice whether I own that emotional state, or physical pain and integrate it into myself. MY CHOICE. You have an endless flow of energy around you in your auric field and your connectivity to others, however, you also can CHOOSE what you allow into your energy field. It is simply acknowledging also to yourself, you have that choice as well.
Now I do understand completely I have had a lot of years practice around this as well and its true I have, yet I worry so much about all the beautiful empathetic people I come across suffering from what they simply feel in others. Plus when reading for Spirit, they will send me their physical and emotional pain over their passing. It is incredibly important NOT to take that into myself. The feeling of a heart attack, broken neck or brain bleed, is NOT nice so I need to move fast to remove that from my being. Plus the emotional impact of the feelings from Spirit, these are more condensed and at times intenser than here. There is a part of us inside all of us, that doesn’t want anyone else to feel in pain, to suffer, at an emotional level or physical level. However, at times we need to also understand that each one of us here has their own journey, their own path to walk and in allowing the flow of another person’s energy through you not being contained in you, means you can very quickly in your own turn, sending hugely loving energy to them, honouring their OWN choices in their personal journey as well.
So understand please what is actually happening energetically when you come in contact with people, or speak to people, you are energetically engaging with them and within that energetic exchange, you have the choice of what you take on board and you have the choice very quickly to decide whether you will allow that energy into your space. So firstly ACKNOWLEDGE…
1. If that is not mine, TAKE IT OFF me immediately. Be very firm about it in your request, and believe that the energy will be removed from you.
2. Envisage yourself as a pane of glass, allowing the energy if it has started to impact you, to flow straight through you and out the other side, acknowledging also that it was not yours to contain in the first place.
3. Ask for white light loving energy from the Universe to flow into your being, re-harmonising you and nurturing YOU first! Allow that energy to flow into your being from your crown chakra down through your whole being and shifting any energetic impact from the other person on your being. Allow this light to wrap you completely and utterly before you send energy to the other person.
Please know this will take some practice, you will have days when you think, Ohhhh bother I forget and feel overwhelmed. Keep remembering that good practices in looking after yourself as an Empath and a human are incredibly important. You have your gift to empower you, it’s not a curse, it is a blessing for it helps you to be empathetic and caring with others, but definitely NOT at a huge, crippling cost to yourself. There is value in understanding other people’s emotions and pain, it helps us all to deal with each other in a more compassionate manner. Learn to love your gift, and work it in a way that serves and empowers you. Simply we need so much more compassion in this world and it’s why you came.
So be kind to you and start to really appreciate who you are by looking after YOU first.