I am lying on a stone floor, beautifully polished slabs of rich grey. I am not uncomfortable for its hardness at all, I am just lying watching the three monks sitting in a triangle, eyes closed, meditating, levitating about 2 feet of the ground in front of me. I glance at the ceiling, which is also stone. It’s an amazing Temple, the feel of it is incredible. It’s so quiet and peaceful. I think for a moment, I can’t even hear Osho, Tao and Hanni breathing. I get the giggles. OMG of course I cannot hear them breathing they are Guides for goodness sake. I close my eyes and try to smother inappropriate giggles and hear the swish of robes.
I open my eyes and see dark eyes surveying me directly above me as Hanni leans over from a standing position to look at my face. “Ermmm Hi!” I mumble. Hanni has the most amazing eyes. Many of the Guides I have had the honour of working with don’t really have eyes. They have what I call the illusion of eyes. Look to closely and their eyes change and you are drawn into Universes, knowledge and wisdom. They represent so much knowledge at times it is simply reflected in their eyes.
I hurriedly sit up and look at him. He looks so serene, robes immaculate, hands tucked serenely into his sleeves, absolute peace and calm radiating from him. He looks at me for a moment with twinkling eyes. “Meditation would serve you”. I refrain from rolling my eyes at him and wave a hand at him. “What? I meditate every day”. His fine eyebrows delicately slide upwards a notch. “All right, so jumping off the planet or into another dimension is NOT quite meditation, I know”. A slight smile curls at the edges of his mouth for a moment.
“Meditation of Mindfulness, would be good for you”. I look at him intently. Funny, har har, should have known there would be a learning, teaching, POKE in it for me! I smile though because behind him Osho and Tao are still floating in the air meditating behind him and I am curious as always of the three of them. They work in so much synchroniscity that if I talk to any of them they are like facets of a crystal, each represents a different aspect but they are of the same understanding, cut from the same stone. Their answers always returned back to me for me to consider.
Hanni leans into me again, “Define your truth” he requests “from a heart perspective” and taps me on the head “not from your mind”. I wrinkle my nose at him and ask “Aren’t we talking about mindfulness?” He laughs gently, “does mindfulness come from the mind?” He floats gently into the lotus position and resumes the triangle of the Guides. I think for a moment and frown, define your truth.
I had someone ask me today, “how do you love yourself”. I think about it in conjunction with define your truth. I listen for a moment to my mind and decide to answer Hanni on the basis of combining those two aspects because if you can love you, you simply have the truth of you. When you decide your truth you never decide it with your mind, that always can point out all the problems, all of the logic, when with your heart it can know with all of your being it just is. I glance at Hanni and see him open just one eye, wink it and close it again. Hmmz, he’s always throwing things for me to consider and that’s exactly what a good teacher would do. For years the Guides have given me things to consider and merely waited for me to gain understanding rather than spoon-feeding me (which I so would have preferred).
I sigh slightly as part of me would rather avoid answer such what I consider a loaded question, because there are actually many truths and your life is defined by how you live your truth in so many ways. One of my truths is to be as honest as I possible can, to be honest but to be kind within that honesty. To try to not judge myself or others simply because we are all at times stumbling through the human journey. To live and love with integrity, to believe in people’s infinite goodness. These are my truths and they are what I believe in my heart. So my heart tells me that everyone has a story, and it’s their story. It doesn’t make them good or bad, just defining their truths for themselves by their experiences as well.
I think I have had my time for blaming other people for things going wrong in my life, because it was more convenient to blame them to look at my role or my part in the circumstance or situation. I remember how I felt at those times and I remember how much I carry on my heart my hurts, both directed at times towards others, but more often than not directed towards myself. Hanni resonates with harmonising frequency that is not so much a sound, but a wave of love, a frequency I can feel in this dimension so well and it surrounds me and fills me with love. “So your truth is?” he asks in my head and I stare at his serenely floating form.
“My truth is my feelings, more than anything in my mind, it is how I feel, that is from my heart always”. The air stills for a moment and the hum frequency from the Guides builds and is almost a tangible presence in the Temple. I relax into the harmony for a moment. “Open your heart chakra” suggests Hanni and I feel like my heart actually creaks with the opening. At times I am so aware on the earth plane, if I fear getting hurt, I close aspects of my heart. Until I can love me without a fear of being hurt by another, I struggle to maintain an open heart at all times on the earth plane. But here it is like being joined with the ultimate connection, loved, supported, in harmony and tune. It is also like revitalising all of my being for a time. I feel loved, and I feel like a flowing strand of love.
I sigh again “How DO I bring that feeling down to the earth plane?” Hanni is standing again beside me and warmly gazes at me. “Ahhhh” he smiles, “that is the goal for most of you on the earth plane, to bring that love, divine love, into being for yourself on the earth plane and then and only then you can see where you can truthfully love one another unconditionally. In the evolution of yourself, you are learning this. In the evolution of your planet you are learning this as well. It is a process”.
I refrain from rolling my eyes at him and raise my eyebrows instead “A process?” He smiles, “The human aspect does not embrace loving itself easily”. He taps on my head, “You are still fighting with yourself too much here, to embrace loving you here” and he taps me gently on the heart. He turns and walks towards the Temple window, Osho and Tao almost flow with him like the pull of twin moons off a planet, serenely floating. I follow them all and walk behind them thinking about what he has said.
We do struggle to love ourselves and yet why? We are critical, condemning, judgemental and cruel at times in our perception of what we think we should be. We strive to be accepted by others, and leave ourselves wide open to hurts at times that seem to blind side us from others, yet we are infinitely crueller to ourselves in our minds. We have the ability to see such beauty, yet in the mirror we can be constantly defining our flaws. We can interact with people and judge ourselves harshly by their either acceptance of us or rejection of us. Yet we are all in this together. How we learn to love ourselves, defines how we truthfully love each other. Until we can be true to ourselves, we run the risk of offering conditional love to others. A love defined by expectations is no love at all, and it is time we dropped the expectations of ourselves to create a more loving environment for ourselves. In doing this, we create loving environments on the planet.
So some hints for starting to bring the love you so desperately want for you to the planet and bearing in mind if you live by your truth then you live by these heart based energies as well.
- Be kind, starting with you first
- Be honest. Not cruel honest, say what I think and stuff everyone else. I mean gently, lovingly honest, starting with YOU first
- Do not put another down or gossip, starting with you first
- Savour moments. Close your eyes and allow yourself to feel, I feel content. I feel cross, I feel lost. ALLOW you to feel
- Give affirmations to yourself. I did the best I could, I am proud of how I handled that. Do not use cruel words to yourself or others
- Love your body, it is after all the only one you have, celebrate that
- Refuse to buy into arguments with yourself. Takes two to have an argument, just simply say Enough.
- Share affection with yourself and others. Allow yourself to be loved.
- Communicate fully, openly not with your mind but spontaneously from your heart, tell people how you feel.
- Stop being so afraid of you. The fears you have of failing are invalid and distorted. You are not scary, you are beautiful. Time to be you.
So have a think about it, your truth, who you are, how much love you give you? How you live in your heart? These are important questions as these are the energies, the frequencies we are moving into and it is simply time to start honouring more your heart based energies for you and for the planet we all love so much. It IS a process, and you are changing within that process, over the next four weeks you will be challenged to allow yourself to open your heart more and you are so deserving of your own love. Please start with you as the world frequencies also start to really show change in the coming weeks.